How to Pivot Your Path & Embrace Change
Shortcuts:1:04—How can you embrace change instead of fear it?
2:52—Daniela's story + How do you carve your own path, & let go of society's expectations?
11:56—What advice do you have for someone who's trying to find their own path?
Transcript from live interview between Yun-A, Founder of Your Aesthetic Style, and Daniela, Designer and Founder of The Humanista Co.
00:00—Yun-A:
I'm so excited today interviewing Daniela, Personal Brand Coach and also Founder of The Humanista Co. and you're going to hear her story—that's what I wanted to really share, because it's awesome, but also how we know each other. One of the reasons why I wanted to interview Daniela is because we grew up together, like we've known each other since we were very little. We met in Washington D.C., our parents were friends and it's been amazing to be a part of being able to see each other's journeys.
I think that's so, so cool but also I've also learned a lot about you from, you know, sharing your story, and I can't wait for you to share with others. I think one of the things that we have very much in common is we have a lot of change in our lives right now, and I think that's one of our friendship points. But that's one of the topics for today that I think is really important for others to hear—how can you embrace change instead of fear it? What would be your advice about that to someone?
1:04—Daniela:
Yeah, first of all hi! So excited to be here. I would say embracing change rather than fearing change is such an awesome question because I think as human beings, we are creatures of habit naturally. Which is awesome, you know, we need that comfort to feel safe. But I think too often, that can turn into this safe cocoon, let's say, where sometimes we even go into hiding a little bit because we get too much in this comfort zo—I say "comfort cocoon" over comfort zone.
And it's okay, you know, it's okay to get in there. But I think at a certain point change can be necessary and maybe inevitable. So for me, how I like to look at change is I embrace it as an adventure. And when I say adventure, my whole energy just changes. I smile because adventure is fun and exciting and I think everybody wants that to some level in their life. We don't want to feel bored and depressed forever in the "comfort cocoon."
So that would be my advice— to really reframe the fear into adventure and go from there.
2:32—Yun-A:
I love it and it's so much more, like you said, proactive like I'm a part of it. I'm choosing this instead of it's happening to me, which I think is huge. With change it feels like sometimes we don't have control which is part of life, not having control, but choosing to see it—that's a brilliant reframe and it also makes sense.
The next question, because you've been through a lot of this—how you can come up with reframing and embracing change—can you share with us a bit about your story and especially this idea of carving your own path. Like how do you let go of society's expectations? Because a lot of times that fear is connected with how we think we should be and how we can embrace what actually is different about us.
3:22—Daniela:
Yeah, such a good question. When I think of my story, I actually go back to childhood where I grew up in this split home. I mean, first of all, my parents divorced when I was young, but besides that I saw them go down two different paths. So I saw my father choose what I call, "the safe route," the sort of conventional, traditional path to success where I saw him in different office jobs, you know, putting on the suit and going into these corporate environments. We grew up in Washington, D.C so you know, that was sort of the norm. That is what society was telling was telling us to do, as you probably know—very ambitious city.
Yun-A: I tell people that in Norway a lot.
4:12—Daniela:
Yeah, totally, very ambitious city. Lots of suits, lots of, you know, suit and tie kind of culture. Which is fine—it is what it is. So I saw my father go down that route and I saw how he was able to provide stability for the family, financial stability. On the other hand, my mom's the total opposite you know, very hippy dippy, free spirit, very creative like incredibly creative. But on her path I saw a lot of struggle, I saw a lot of difficulty as an artist, as a photographer, a lot of financial instability. A lot of self-doubt and and fear over what's gonna happen tomorrow, where will the money come from.
I think as a kid, I formed that belief—here are the two options, here are the two ways of working—and I'm gonna pick the safe one because that will bring me stability. So early on, watching how my parents approached work planted the seeds there of what path to go down.
But flash forward to college, you know, I did my bachelor's, I went through college….I felt the need for a big adventure in my life and I felt called to actually do a semester abroad in Spain. I can't really tell you why. Like no one was telling me to do this, but I felt in my gut this was an experience—an adventure—I needed to have. Yeah, I love the adventure! I felt I needed to do it to grow in some way. So that experience abroad led to more. It kind of opened the doors for more adventures and it turned into a really big soul-searching journey for me.
But at a certain point, you know I realized, "okay something inside me is telling me enough with the fun, enough the travel and the adventures, it's time to grow up and get a big girl job." I actually felt—I had this thought— so I kind of left that lifestyle behind in my early 20s and I moved back to Washington D.C. and I got a big girl job. You know, I put on my nice blazers and my nice corporate attire and learned how to interview well and learned how to talk the talk walk the walk. And there I was, and there I found myself for several years kind of cycling through these different office jobs.
And what happened was sort of this chronic dissatisfaction. I would get into a job a couple of months. I would feel good, but something would happen where I would start to feel my soul sucked away.
I don't know if you ever felt that, but yeah, not for you kind of job, where you know it's not right for you but you don't know why and you don't know what else to do and so you just keep doing it because that's all you know. This was me for several years continuing down that path chronically job hopping, you know, trying to find meaning. Trying to find something enjoyable and fulfilling and nothing seemed to work.
7:20—So what happened? One day I was waking up to go to one of my office jobs and I just felt paralyzed. I couldn't get out of bed. This had never happened to me before. It was like my body just shut down and it would not let me go into work that day. And all I could do was cry, to be honest. The floodgates opened and I felt like something inside me just broke, it just broke that day. And all I could think to do is was grab a pen you know grab a journal and just express myself just get these emotions out that were so confusing.
And in doing that and really like opening myself up to what was happening inside, I actually received clarity. I've never had a moment like that until that day when I opened myself to get some clarity. And I was so sick of feeling unfulfilled you know, and and in that moment, I actually had this flashback to when I was a kid. And I was a very creative kid—I would sing, I would write poetry, I had a blog as a young teenager. And as a kid you just get into these things for the hell of it, you know—there's no goal, there's no reason—you just enjoy it, you just flow, and it feels freeing.
So that day, I remembered that little girl. And I remembered this big part of me that I had become so disconnected from as an adult—my own creativity.
Yes, it was my own creative self. It was a huge part of me that I was not embracing. I was hiding it. I was denying it, and I suffered for years because of that. And so I just I really wanted to tell that story because that was really the catalyst that led me to make a decision where that day I decided to commit to truly making a change in my life. I knew I couldn't keep going down that corporate path that I was on—not that there was anything wrong with the corporate path—but I knew it was wrong for me. I knew it didn't suit who I really was at my core.
And so I decided to do whatever it took to carve out a new path. I had no idea what that was going to look like yet. This was a year and a half ago actually, I had no idea what it would look like, but I knew there had to be something else. There's got to be a different way of working and making money—and finding fulfillment—more than anything.
10:27—So, long story short, I took a personal development test around that time and I got some really good answers. It told me that I was meant to be a coach and from there it kind of planted the spark. I felt a little spark, I felt a little nudge to check out coaching and learn more about it. And the more I did, the more I realized—yep, this is the path for me. And here we are now.
10:53—Yun-A:
Yeah, here we are. And then that's like the beginning, taking the steps. But I think what I also find fascinating just hearing your story is that it's like, as you said, it's finding that right path for you. Carving the path for everyone and now we go on these steps. Even though you went on a lot of adventures and change in your college years—and I think a lot of people can relate to that where they explored things and found out things about themselves—but then it was like, okay now that time's over, and now it's kind of interesting why we do that, and think, “Okay, now I have to start big adult life.” I think there's a lot of things that people are starting to question now I can just say so it's very relevant your story and it's very, very inspiring to hear. Thank you for sharing.
11:56—I think for our final question— what would you say to someone who's listening who's trying to find their path? I think for a lot of people I know, it's sort of like you explained in your corporate period of your life where you were looking but you didn't quite know what you wanted and you were just hoping to find that feeling. So what would you say to someone for how they could at least get on part of that path, maybe they don't know, they don't have necessarily that clarity, but what would be a good first step?
12:32— Daniela:
Oh, that's such a good question. Yeah, it's like what is the first step on their new adventure, right? Well, I would say it can be so overwhelming when you think about changing your life, changing your career, you know—whatever change you want—that can be so overwhelming. And if you don't even know what it is yet, I recommend baby steps. Take it really, really small. Break it down into a really small piece for yourself to clarify. And the first baby step I recommend is expressing yourself to find clarity so trying to dig deep. For me, the best way I find clarity is through writing.
When I journal, I just kind of free-flow letting all those emotions out, letting all the frustrations out, and letting kind of my inner voice come out through paper because I truly believe that inner voice knows what it wants but we put so many blocks in front of it so it can't come out.
So just take one little baby step, choose whatever outlet works and feels natural to you to express yourself to let your emotions out and just kind of free flow and let it out and see what happens. Because I think in this brainstorm venting process, some answers will come up—some clarity will come out.
14:16—Yun-A:
Totally. And I love that, I think that's great advice for anyone listening or reading. But it's really being able to address your frustrations—where you are now and just free flow—because I think sometimes, even how I started looking for change, was feeling like, "I don't even know what I'm looking for, but I feel frustrated that I can't answer," and it's just adding to the frustrations instead of talking about that first. So I think that's brilliant—just first get it out and all those things that are blocking you from clarity. Thank you so much for these valuable gems!
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